Footprints and shadows

It’s spring, and the process of renewal happens. Sometimes it’s all bunnies and pansies, but other times I’m reminded the universe isn’t sentimental. In the past two days, I heard one of my long-time supervisors (now retired) passed away in her sleep, I wrote a farewell message in the going-away book of the boss who just left, and I see the posting for his replacement is out.  All this reminds me that none of us is irreplaceable and that all we have control over is the memory we leave behind. That will fade, too, but for as long as it lasts, I want my shadow to be a pleasant one.

Since I’m a supervisor, too, I understand my role isn’t all about popularity. Some of it is about expectations, boundaries, and performance, but for the most part I have fabulous staff and discipline is not an issue. I have the privilege of concentrating on teaching, support, and seeing my folks reach their goals. If they compete for a better position and successfully move on, I’m sad but proud.

I try hard because I know how badly things can suck. At various times I’ve had very good and very difficult individuals in control of my work life. All of them taught me something, even if it was not to be like that. Understanding why someone behaves as they do may lead to sympathy, but it doesn’t prevent a sense of relief when the misery is over.  On the other hand, there have been people I truly miss a lot. I think of them every time I need to check my own messaging. Am I being fair? Am I helping? Am I putting responsibility where it belongs?

Someday, I will be replaced. Today reminded me of that. How other people respond to that moment is entirely up to me.